Battle of the Greyhounds: The Layover vs Cafe Van Kleef

Both have the old school grapefruit juicer, but who squeezes and mixes best? Ferronlandia sent in the thirsty troops to find out.

Layover

 

The drink-To be honest, they skimped on the grapefruit. Never thought I would say it, but too much alcohol, not enough juice. However, the bartender was 1. cute 2. responded "crazy dogs" when I asked him what he calls a grapefruit & tequila and 3. made this delicious alternative for me: tequila, grapefruit and squirt- a paloma with real grapefruit!

The scene-If you need an alternative to the Saturday night sloppy sleazy of Lukas or Mua, come and find a good-humored, motley crowd here. I had three pleasant conversations with strangers (alright, cute guys) and the rest of the bar was too busy getting down to talk to nobody. Comfy couches and a big enough dance floor to dance salsa like a Mexican (elbows, hella elbows). Warning, the DJ has major ADD- the minute you start enjoying a song it turns into something else. I won't hate though, I was happy with the transitions.

Van Kleef

The drink- Major points on the pulp factor. My friend pointed out that the giant slice of grapefruit on the rim puts Van Kleef's grapefruit to vodka ratio at perfection. It's like drinking a vodka-filled grapefruit, which for some disturbing reason just made me think breakfast.

The scene- Looks like Fairy Godmother Salvage Yard waved her wand and sprinkled relics of  the 60's, Mardi Gras, and Wyoming across the walls here. Funky like your grandma's cluttered closet that still has a few wigs and flapper dresses, cozy like your brother's hot-boxed basement with the couch you don't want to leave. Try and check out the music before paying cover but it's always a good conversation space.
The winner? Van Kleef for the drink, Layover for the scene. Good thing you can do both in one night.

Got the travel bug?
http://www.cafevankleef.com/ ($5 on weekends)
http://oaklandlayover.com/ (no cover)

LA for Dinner, LA for Breakfast

A good guide is one who picks you up from the airport and says,
"You hungry? Great, I know delicious Thai place. It's a total dive."
The thing I love about a 12-hour trip is that you have a very short window to have a bad meal. Couple it with a cousin that knows how to eat and you're bound to have two great meals like this:

Dinner: Sri Siam Cafe makes a duck curry that melts in your mouth- pineapple, peppers, whole tomatoes and perfectly cooked duck. A Tom Kha Gai with some heat, a beef salad to cool you off, and a Sapporo to wash it down. Here the owner runs out in his chef's coat to make a delivery, there's neatly written Thai script on the whiteboard (OK, I don't know what messy Thai script looks like), the "mild" means "damn spicy," and you can bring your own beer in from the liquor store next door. A chill and authentic lil dive.


Breakfast:  If the bacon waffle I had in NY and Jumpin Java's Cinnamon-Kiss French Toast had to get in the ring together and battle it out for fattiest fat girl breakfast, I'm not sure who would win. The baguette is dipped in brandy egg batter and glazed in sugar and cinnamon, towered on top of caramelized bananas and walnuts, and showered with powdered sugar. I've never put aside a cup of butter and a bottle of syrup so immediately.

 

Jumpin Java is a pleasant throw back- The faded green and yellow color scheme hints at their 15 year history and so does the genuine friendliness of their servers. They're nice, but not overly nice- cause they know you'll wander back. 

Oh! And if it's a sunny day you can sit outside and then head over to the farmer's market just two blocks down.

Got the travel bug?
http://jumpinjavarestaurant.com/ (Studio City)

http://www.srisiamcafe1.com/ (North Hollywood)

Family Dinner by Guest Photographer Yvan Iturriaga

What does Ferronlandia love more than going out to eat? Family dinner. Danny performing miracles on the stove, Claudio deboning the chicken, Jen cooing over the rainbow chard, and guest photographer Yvan "Santiago Slim" Iturriaga snapping away. By the way, the second photo is the most typical photo possible- Danny is making a funny face, Claudio has his eyes closed as in every picture, my sister is looking adorable, and I'm an angry monster because I'm hungry.

Get happy this Sunday at Glide

Last month I did something one Sunday morning that didn't involve food or nursing my hangover. I didn't go to the farmer's market, I didn't go to coffee, and I didn't go to brunch. I went to church.

Not to worry Grandma, I'm still an atheist yet culturally fluent Jew (uh, I'm not sure if that actually makes her feel better). But I had to work at Glide on one rainy Sunday and I thought I would stay for the service (actually called the Sunday Celebration). I've volunteered in the kitchen before, but had only heard about the ensemble.

First of all, and I realize this is an inappropriate remark considering the drug rehabilitation work that Glide does, but I want some of whatever that choir is on.  Is it happy pills? The singers are all so different looking, but their joyful glory is totally in sync and it's damn contagious! Slow to wake up on Sunday mornings? Me too, but trust me-  Oh Happy Day will get ya.

Second, I knew Glide was special, but I didn't know how politically right on the sermons are. I was reminded to vote, I was reminded that we are all Oscar Grant, I was reminded of people who fight for their beliefs and love unconditionally, I was reminded that my weekends should not only be filled with food and drinks and mayhem, but a little time to remember and celebrate my values. 

Got the travel bug?
More details about volunteering and Sunday celebrations: http://www.glide.org/

Sicky

Sorry amigos, Ferronlandia was on a brief hiatus thanks to a bad bad virus. How bad you ask? Let me put it to you like this- all those years making fun of my Jewish boyfriends and their allergies, inhalers, overprotective grandmothers, and other forms of endearing dorkdom bit me in the ass- well, lungs. I had an inhaler. I don't even know what drug it puffed into my lungs, but I know that it's red and matching my shoes to it didn't make me any cooler. Turned on yet?

The good thing is that while I was confined to such invigorating beverages as water and purple drank, I still had the endless possibilities of netflix and books my sister gave me for my birthday. So next time your world shrinks into a tiny mess of herbal tea and tissues here are Ferronlandia's recommendations to brighten it up:

Caramel: A "we all get togetha in a beauty shop" classic but in Beirut! A mix of beautiful women, a hot policeman, forbidden love, sexual repression, and another confirmation that men will be men but sisterhood always triumphs!

The Sex Lives of Cannibals by J.Maarten Troost: Talk about getting far away! This dude went to Tarawa, an atoll in the South Pacific nation of Kiribati. To live. The result is a hilarious account of his moments of victory (finding something to listen to aside from 'la macarena", dolphins swimming in circles around him, bold sunsets), utter wackiness (a government interministry dance competition) and disgust (no sewer system. Just a large ocean. Used as a toilet.)

Outsourced:  If I was a lazy professor teaching an international business class I would play this. That's actually giving this movie way too much academic credit- it's a cute romantic comedy based in India. More like, if I was looking for a romantic comedy but too ashamed to watch Notting Hill or My Best Friend's Wedding for the gazillionth time, I would try this one on for size.

And finally, when it was time to exchange the PJs for real clothes and face the world without my inhaler (hey, it kinda grew on me!) this was what was knocking out of my speakers. No idea what's going on in the video, btw.
(credit to Ulie)
Be well!